Farewell to a Friend – A One Shot Story

By David Pauley

A recent spring vacation in Europe with our daughter ended in sadness with the death, back home, of our beloved dog Milo at age 14. He had been gradually failing over the past month, so much so that we considered postponing our trip. (It was the same trip we had already rescheduled a year back after my 96 year-old Mother had a fall, the subject of one of my very first posts here on 35mmc).  Our friends who stayed with Milo and our younger dog Ollie assured us they would look after him, and so they did in incredible fashion. His final decline came only as we were in the air approaching JFK; he died peacefully while we were in the taxi from the airport, his body still warm as we arrived.

Grieving a pet is an experience like no other, qualitatively different than the loss of a person, yet tenacious and it its own way profound. Although I have experienced such loss in the past, and have accompanied numerous friends and patients as they’ve grappled with it, I have no special wisdom that allows me to rise above mourning or have any distance from it. Whether for a person or for a pet, grief acts through us. It takes us by hand and leads, bit by painstaking bit. Any notion that we can direct its workings is bound to fall short.

Still, anticipating that his time with us might be limited, I made some portraits of Milo with my Rolleiflex on the eve of our departure for Europe. I found the undeveloped film in a drawer in my darkroom, awaiting processing, the morning after we said goodbye to him.

Like many family pets, Milo has figured in innumerable photographs taken in our house during his lifetime. They show him in the full flush of puppy rambunctiousness; barking protectively as a concerned “brother” as my daughter and her friends plunge madly into the deep end of a pool; festooned with ribbons or a Santa hat on countless birthdays and Christmases.

The image I’ve included here shows Milo in his favorite chair in the relaxed posture that was a constant in his older age. Shot with a close-up adaptor, it is the dreamiest frame on that roll, and—owing to his unruffled, soulful expression (he had no fear of the camera, and seemed instinctively to know what was expected)—it is by far my favorite.

In addition to the scanned image, I’ve made a 10×10 inch print of the photo in the darkroom. It will in due course find a suitable spot in our home.

Thanks for reading.

You can see more of my photos on my website, leica1933.com.

 

FEATURED IMAGE: Milo Sitting for a Portrait, 2026. Rolleiflex 2.8F, Rolleinar II Close-Up Adaptor, Kodak Tri-X 400 rotary processed with Pyrocat PMK Developer.

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About The Author

By David Pauley
I'm a Brooklyn-based photographer and psychoanalyst. My journey with photography began in middle school in the late 1970s and revived in 2019 when I bought a used film camera and installed a darkroom in my basement. I'm committed to analog photography and am enthusiastic about the expressive power of old cameras, traditional processes and methods. You can see more of my work at www.leica1933.com.
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Comments

Walter Reumkens on Farewell to a Friend – A One Shot Story

Comment posted: 23/03/2026

A moving and very well-written story. I’ve had to go through a similar situation twice myself.
It’s the same photo of Milo, but I much prefer the print in the frame, David.
.
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David Pauley replied:

Comment posted: 23/03/2026

Thank you Walter! The relatively shorter lifespan of domestic pets unfortunately guarantees that we must go through such sad passages, but still they are worth it. Glad you liked the physical print -- paper almost always looks better than scans, at least the scans they I'm able to get from my tech.

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Art Meripol on Farewell to a Friend – A One Shot Story

Comment posted: 23/03/2026

I’m so sorry David. It’s a very soulful photo. I love the sweet dignity of senior dogs. We lost our sweet beloved Ellie last week and bereft doesn’t cover it. Still look for her gentle tail wag every morning.
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David Pauley replied:

Comment posted: 23/03/2026

Oh no, Art! I'm so sorry to hear about Ellie. Bereft is a great and evocative word but agreed at moments seems wholly inadequate. Thanks for your response and know that I'll be thinking about you.

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Curtis Heikkinen on Farewell to a Friend – A One Shot Story

Comment posted: 23/03/2026

Touching piece and great photo! Losing a pet is a terrible experience but what a wonderful tribute!
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David Pauley replied:

Comment posted: 23/03/2026

Thank you Curtis! I really appreciate your support.

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Jeffery Luhn on Farewell to a Friend – A One Shot Story

Comment posted: 23/03/2026

David,
So sorry to hear about the loss of Milo. The departure of a pet is in a sad class all its own. Dogs and humans have been friends for at least 30,000 years, often depending upon each other for survival. Even though the conditions and challenges of our environment have radically changed over time, our two species have found ways to deepen the bond.
We lost our dog, Sherlock, in July of 2025. My wife and I agreed that we'd wait a year to get another furry friend, but after a few months we realized what a giant hole was left by her absence. It wasn't healing. Our friend at the Humane Society sent us a picture of a 10-month-old puppy that resembled some photos of Whitefang, a white wolf-looking dog I had owned in my 20's. We went 'just to take a look' and came home with Yuki.
Every dog is different, and every dog is alike. There may be a shared spirit between all dogs, past and present, that manifests itself stronger than the similarities between one person and another. That's my feeling. One day you'll connect with another dog. It won't be Milo, but it will have some of Milo's heart. Some of Milo's desires. Much of Milo's loyalty. Dogs are a gift.
Jeffery
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David Pauley on Farewell to a Friend – A One Shot Story

Comment posted: 23/03/2026

Thank you Jeffrey for your response and for sharing your story about losing Sherlock and the arrival of Yuki. I agree that dogs as a species have a commonality that is reassuring and hopeful, notwithstanding the pain that happens when we lose a beloved member of the pack. Having our younger dog Ollie has been a godsend this past week, though in his own doggie way he is also showing the effects of Milo's loss (like all younger siblings, he looked up to his big brother). Without Ollie here and the canine energy he brings I think we'd be even more out of our minds than we are...
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Bill Brown on Farewell to a Friend – A One Shot Story

Comment posted: 24/03/2026

David, So interesting that this story posted today. I just turned in several rolls of Porta 160 for processing and scanning. That's not unusual except these rolls date back to the summer of 2024. They've been resting in my refrigerator until I felt I could handle seeing the images recorded on them. Our beloved family member of almost 15 years, a miniature poodle named Ginger, had to be put to rest in August of 2024 after a short but intense struggle with throat cancer. She passed quietly while I held her in my arms.

Even now as I write this my grief still lingers. She was such a treasure to us and like others have written it is so quiet to come home without her happy barks and elation at my return. One of my photographer friends was kind enough to gift me with a photo session 5 days before her death. I created a beautiful tryptic of us and it resides on the buffet where we display our family photos. Adare at Chewy sent us a card and beautiful little basket of flowers. I dried the flowers and they are displayed with the tryptic.

I'm excited and apprehensive as I await the day when my lab tells me my film is ready to be picked up. Maybe these last photos will help to bring closure to my heart. Hang in there. It does get easier over time but there will always be a special place in your heart for Milo.

That's a beautiful print! Thanks for sharing your story.
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David Pauley replied:

Comment posted: 24/03/2026

My goodness, Bill. I can so totally relate to your apprehension and also anticipation about seeing the images of Ginger on those rolls. They may very well bring back the loss but also I'm sure they will bring back happy memories too. Your post reminds me that I still dream on occasion about the Irish Setter we had when I was a boy, and who we had to put down when I was just out of college. I'm always happy to see him in the dreams despite some part of my mind doing the math and understanding that he would be forty plus years old by now. The sadness after so many years is gone but the affection remains. Best wishes as you await the arrival of those rolls, and kudos also to you and your friend who took the earlier portraits of Ginger. Photographs help!

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Bill Brown replied:

Comment posted: 24/03/2026

My older brother had an Irish Setter named Toasty. Once when taking her for for a walk she wrapped the chain around my legs and drug me through a mud puddle. I was only 5 at the time and she meant no harm. Maybe that's why I've always owned smaller dogs such as terriers, beagles and lastly a miniature poodle.

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David Pauley replied:

Comment posted: 24/03/2026

Our setter Sean was also amazingly strong and pulled me over on occasion too! He was 75 or 80 pounds at his prime as opposed to about 50 for Milo and Ollie. He had a more energetic even hyper temper than they do but those extra 30 pounds of muscle also made life an adventure with him!

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Ashish Tamhane on Farewell to a Friend – A One Shot Story

Comment posted: 24/03/2026

Losing a pet can be really hard. I just read upon a story in the last week in the newspaper that a 13 odd year old girl took her life upon the loss of her pet dog. I myself had many stray kittens in the past and upon losing them the grief was unimaginable.
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David Pauley replied:

Comment posted: 24/03/2026

Hi Anish, and thanks for your response. I'm so very sorry to hear about the thirteen year old girl's untimely death. I agree of course that the pain of losing a pet is enormous but can't help but think of how much greater her loss must be for her parents and everyone who loved her. As a mental health professional and parent I always feel that we as adults collectively have failed when a child feels compelled to make such an awful choice. It's not rational I know but still that's my honest response. Thankfully most kids and adults who suffer the loss of pets are able to find ways to connect with others (as is happening here in a small way on this blog) and to share the grief. I'm moved by your support and by those of everyone who's posted.

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Scott Peterson on Farewell to a Friend – A One Shot Story

Comment posted: 24/03/2026

So sorry for your loss David. It's absolutely heart breaking when we lose one of our furry family members. We are on our third golden retriever and it never gets easy when one passes on. What a beautiful picture of Milo that will remind you of the joyous 14 years you shared with him.
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David Pauley replied:

Comment posted: 24/03/2026

Thank you Scott. Our daughter's boyfriend and his family just got a 10 week old Golden Retriever to accompany their much older dog. Seeing videos of the new dog's adorable energy definitely makes me feel hopeful (though my goodness what a lot of effort puppies are...!). I think as dog people we will definitely have more furry friends in the future, though for now our eight year old black lab mix Ollie is doing yeoman service.

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Dogman on Farewell to a Friend – A One Shot Story

Comment posted: 24/03/2026

My condolences, David. As you can tell by my name, I'm a lover of all things Dog. Sadly, I've seen several of my best friends off on their final journeys. I'm comforted by a passage from Robert B. Parker in one of his Spenser detective novels. Paraphrasing (poorly), Heaven is a place that, once you arrive, all the dogs you've ever loved come running to meet you.

Milo shows his sweet disposition in your portrait...it's in his eyes. Those photos, like the memories, will always be with you. I've taken many photos of my current best friend Christie. I've also proudly plastered her photo all over my Flickr account. That's what proud parents do--bore others with photos of the kids.
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David Pauley replied:

Comment posted: 24/03/2026

Thank you so much for this wonderful post, which really lifted my spirits at the end of a long day. I wasn't familar with but absolutely love the passage from Robert B. Parker—perfect, and really made me smile. I'll look forward to seeing Christie on Flickr, that is if your handle there is the same as your username here.

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Dogman on Farewell to a Friend – A One Shot Story

Comment posted: 25/03/2026

I think Flickr calls me Dogman2x. Someone else came first.
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David Pauley replied:

Comment posted: 25/03/2026

Thanks!

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Scott Ferguson on Farewell to a Friend – A One Shot Story

Comment posted: 26/03/2026

Hey David,
As always, great post! I'm sorry for your loss and love how you captured Milo's personality in that terrific photo. Portraits of dogs can be difficult because their faces have so much more depth than people, but you've managed to nail focus in a way that brings out Milo's heart and soul. Very touching and beautiful...
Best,
s
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David Pauley replied:

Comment posted: 26/03/2026

Thanks so much, Scott. The Rolleinars are tricky to focus with, especially wide open, but I knew I only wanted the one eye (the left one) to be ultra-sharp and the rest to fade a bit. Out of 12 shots on the roll this is the one that got closest to my visualization.

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Richard Angeloni on Farewell to a Friend – A One Shot Story

Comment posted: 27/03/2026

A wonderful photo and heartfelt tribute to Milo, David. As you noted losing a loving pet is indeed difficult and very different than the loss we usually feel when losing a human friend or relative. You certainly captured his spirit in this photo. While dogs (as well as cats and other pets) don't live as long as we do, their spirits lives in in our hearts and minds.
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David Pauley replied:

Comment posted: 27/03/2026

Thank you so much, Richard, for your kind words.

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